Tag Archives: loss

December and Christmas

Hello mishmashlearning, not seen you for a while. I now blog more frequently about my art through http://www.andyknillart.com.

So December – last year I took part in an event in Swanage calls Artisans on the Beach for 7 weeks. By the end of it I was announced as Artisan of the Year and it was suggested I should be on the committee / working group for the proposed 2018 event.

It is now 2018, I am one of two artisans on the working group. This year the Artisans on the Beach event started on December 1 and finishes on January 2nd after about 5.5 weeks. I have also become named event organiser from the artisan aspect and taken on tasks including the social media marketing on Facebook and Instagram.

I have at last arrived at that old phrase transferable skills – organisation, spreadsheets, social media work etc , when someone praised my organisation skills I was at pains to point out the demands were less than those needed for a days teaching. I am enjoying my role and will be asked no to be considered to repeat the role for 2019 and possibly subsequent years.

My art is also found at the Purbeck Artisan Yard, Wareham. There I have found myself producing admin. Documents again for the same reasons and those skills again. My artwork is d finitely selling more in my second year. I have greatly increased the range of my work available and initiatives like Christmas cards started for December 2017 now account for a third of my card sales of over £2k.

I am back doing winter training with Swanage Sea Rowing and haven’t injured myself so far, so fitness is increasing gradually. I hope in 2019 to be out exercising much more.

Memories – December has been a difficult time for my family the last two years. Mum passed away in 2016 and last year at this time I sat by Dad’s side before he passed away on Christmas Day. I had a dip thinking about this last week while at the huts one day. I now feel in a better place but will miss the family gathering in Broadstairs even though I found them hard myself from a mental health perspective. Mum and Dad both believed in an afterlife, so I hope they can communicate with each other easily again and are happy with what they see their offspring up to these days. Clearing the family base as it is now sold (almost) turned up many memories and items from their lives and their families too.

My eldest has made changes in his life this year but is still difficult to communicate with, I wish him all the best and stay in contact when possible. My youngest took on a job this year and has shown much maturity about work and maturing in some ways. My mother in law at 96 continues to thrive but it would have been nice for where we live now for her to have retained more of her sight so that she could see the birds and wildlife more easily.

Finally Anne, my fab wife of 25 years now who I am getting to know again now that work is not a barrier that separates me from the family as it had a tendency to do when teaching.

So Christmas Day rest well washing up for me tomorrow. Then back to the hut but hopefully a focus on positive memories.

Seasons greetings to anyone that still follows this blog.

Andy

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Wasted investment? Why do so many teachers leave the profession in the first 5 years?

I’ve read, met and listened to Edutronic speak now on a number of occasions and am inspired by his drive and innovative ideas to develop his students. In that light I have chosen to contribute to #blogsync.

2013 marks my 25th year full time in my chosen profession of teaching. Always happy and fulfilled? No definitely not, yet I’m still here – how is that? To be honest I’m really not always sure how. My wife identifies that I love working with the pupils – surely all teachers do? No I fear that is not always the case.

So what have been the moments where I’ve considered departing from teaching?

There have been periods in my career like many colleagues where my life has been subsumed by work to the detriment of myself and others around me. Physical health has been neglected leading to years of steroid treatment for my asthma. Mental health has fluctuated and been balanced at times by exercise, talking therapies, CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) and through the use of anti- depressants. like Robert Crampton who writes in The Times, that input has become a constant that provides the cushioning when life threatens to bottom out.

Pressures have been multi faceted and have not just come from work, transitions,changes, have all affected me. But, outside school I have had my own pressures. These have combined on a number of occasions to make me question my competence, ability to change and whether I am cut out to perform in this demanding role. When others suggest I leave teaching however I fight tooth and nail to remain. It completes me, I get to learn new things most days, I challenge myself to keep up to date. The last two years have been strengthened by Twitter and the attendance at Teachmeets. I am one of the lucky few that have discovered this mass of keen and supportive people.

But enough of me, why train then leave?

Fellow PGCE students back in the 1980s left the profession after training – too much to take on. Burn out on a personal level. Lives subsumed and spat out if they could not adjust to the pace and demands of change. Support for new staff has always varied and it is having the freedom to seek support and often to admit weaknesses openly that many find very hard, or even safe to do so without being judged and condemned. They withdraw into themselves. Alcohol provides a nice crutch but one that can destroy as well.

The teachers life is multi – faceted, demands come in many forms from the marking, the behaviour of challenging individuals – staff and pupils. The demands of employers, parents, communities which overlap.

Our governmental support – woefully lacking for teachers – we are often accused of incompetence, not ambitious enough for our charges, too liberal…friends who criticise the holidays, yet where are these people when it comes to stepping up to do the job in this improved version? I’ve yet to meet them.

Why train and leave within five years? Because sadly the profession is a target to beat for many outside it and some within it. While that continues turnover shall remain high – is this the future we want for our pupils? Really??