Well, I have now been keeping my GOB journal / diary for 3 weeks and every day contains at least one positive, most days include a range of activities or outcomes that can be seen as positive. I have taken my journal to two support group meetings on the 4th and 18th. I have recorded some of the negatives as context or where fight / flight impulses have been felt.
Actions including drastically reducing my time on social media are working gradually. I have returned to reading my library book and hope to finish a few before the extended return date is reached. I am pacing myself when it comes to rowing sessions as my fitness has increased but needs to go much further. My physical therapy is noticeably helping and this week I have breathing exercises to work on which is an area I have been very aware of needing to address.
Seeing the few online contacts I have discussing events like BETT (UK educational IT show) which I have no interest in anymore and a local vacancy for a field tutor role which previously I might have jumped at. I have seen some seasonal vacancies start to be advertised and have made enquiries and have applications to complete.
Overall my mood is better than it was 12 days ago (not so long ago!!), but I am still having large dips in mood on occasions. I am doing my best to be mindful that these are in the minority.
Apologies to friends for whom I disappeared from social media without notice it was due to a realisation that it was taking up too much of my time and was not helping my state of mind. I admit that I am not missing Twitter, several people on it, but not the whole experience.
So this is an update and I will post these occasionally as I continue with my journal. There have been some aspects of personal clarity that I am not going to share but I am working on these to help myself going forwards.